This article was originally published in 2018 but has been updated in August 2024 with more ideas and tighter copy. I hope you find it helpful.
I’m going to show you three headlines. Each one featured on the homepage of an ecommerce sex shop. There’s no prize for spotting what they have in common. (I’ll even ruin it for you and say, they all make the same claim.) But what I want you to do is think about how you feel after reading them back-to-back.
Example 1: Australia’s No. 1 Online Sex Toy Store
Example 2: Australia’s #1 Adult Retailer
Example 3: #1 Sex Shop In AU
Now imagine you’re a potential customer to those stores. How did you feel reading those very similar headlines one after the other? Suspicious? Bored? Lied to? You glazed over them? Maybe you even felt angry? (That’s how I felt.)
Buying an intimate item is, for most people, a personal, thoughtful shopping journey. (Not always, I know. But usually.) They’ll spend time:
- researching products
- thinking about price and shipping
- comparing similar items from different brands
- reading reviews (apparently between one and six)
- contacting retailers to get their questions answered.
By the time they’ve done all of this they’ve visited multiple online sex stores, hopping between sites to gather the information they need.
While I appreciate “number 1 sex shop” and “the best sex shop” are highly prized SEO terms, at this stage in the ecommerce game they do very little to make a memorable impression or encourage customer trust. And, when people are looking at so many sites in quick succession, being memorable is what brings them back to you.
So what’s the better headline option?
Lead with a differentiator. Something that makes the business stand out and, ideally, charms your ideal customer.
Tangent: Charming copy is powerful copy
Drayton Bird is considered one of the great legends of copywriting. He worked with, and sold his business, to David Ogilvy. Bird says this about using charm in your copy.
“Charm is often the missing ingredient. The difference between good and great.
That’s because we prefer to buy from people we like.
And it’s the very reason why whenever I edit, I look for ways to inject charm into the copy.
Doing so transforms its power.
Sometimes, it’s a simple as adding what I christened ‘nod factor’ years ago.
You get your prospect nodding in agreement as they bump along reading your copy.
The thing about nod factor is it usually pulls on something emotional. The end result is charm.”
When writing headlines, subheads and definitely body copy, look for ways to charm your customers. Not in a smarmy, weird way. But get them nodding along with you in agreement, confirming that your ideals align with theirs.
How to write a memorable, customer-friendly headline for your sex shop
Homepage headlines highlight why you’re the tits. It’s the space you use to make your first impression. And it’s where you communicate how you’re different from your competitors. This work is part of your business and brand positioning.
If you haven’t given any thought yet to what makes you different, answer these two questions before writing your headline. (Both taken from the briefing form I use with new clients.)
- What values and beliefs currently define your brand?
- What 2-3 things set you apart from other similar businesses? (These could be as a result of your values.)
Your answers will feed into your copy messaging.
Struggled to identify what sets you apart? I can help with that.
I’ve been writing for the adult industries for over a decade. Here are a few ideas that have worked well for my clients, or I’ve seen work well on other sites.
Low cost delivery
Depending on where you are in the world, free or low-cost delivery can be a really attractive pull. It certainly is in Australia, where postage costs are high. Offering free, discounted or low-cost courier options will, therefore, be very eye-catching to a customer. Especially for those who are hesitating because postage pushed the whole transaction over their budget.
Image: Claudio Schwarz on Unsplash
Free returns
If someone receives a faulty product, or they decide it’s not wanted (within a certain timeframe and unopened), then free returns are a good way to keep the B2C relationship feeling boos, not bitter. No one wants to fork out money to give something back.
The downside? It’s a business expense you’ll need to absorb. But if you can do it then it communicates a message of helpfulness and that you’re prepared to fully support your customers.
If covering this cost is a no-go, then try positioning that support differently. Your differentiator could be your no quibble returns policy. The customer will pay to send it back, but the replacement, exchange, refund, or store credit is given without the person having to jump through hoops to get it.
Range and choice
If you’re a ‘stack ’em high’ store, say something about the number of products you stock. Some examples I can think of that work include:
- Hundreds of vibrators
- More masturbators than you can shake a stick at
- Lots of lube for all types of sex
- New products added weekly.
Avoid superlatives you can’t substantiate, like ‘The largest collection of…’ or ‘More vibes than any other…’ That phrasing lands businesses back in the bull shit boat.
If your range is more selective, then that’s your differentiator. You’ve got a ‘handpicked’ or ‘bespoke’ collection.
Customer service
This is an obvious one for bricks and mortar stores but it’s just as important for online sex shops. Are you doing everything you can to provide excellent customer service and support? And what does that look like?
If you have an online sales assistant from 9am-5pm, then shout about this. How about providing customer support on social media or using articles and email newsletters? Do this well and there’s no reason why you couldn’t build up your USP over time to something like:
Over 1,000 people have trusted us to answer their sex toy questions. What do you need to know?
Great customer service can then lead to positive reviews. Which is another differentiator that’s easily substantiated. (More than 2,000 positive reviews on [review site], for example.)
Niches and specialisms
While some stores specialise in stocking a wide-range of items, others are more selective. (Such as the ‘bespoke’ or ‘boutique collections, I mentioned before.) If you’re store only stocks BDSM items or cock cages, for example, this is your differentiator.
To really make it work as a headline, you should add two more details.
- Say a bit about why you specialise in these items
- Highlight the benefit to the customer when they shop with a retailer dedicated to the sort of products they want.
Using the BDSM retailer as an example, the headline might run something like this.
Find everything you need for your next fetish night.
Handpicked BDSM products by people who live the lifestyle.
Finessing your homepage headline
Before writing your homepage headline, make sure you’ve identified:
- what makes you different
- why your customers like shopping with you.
These are ideal points to include in your headline. Once you’ve got that brand messaging sussed, you’re ready to hone your homepage headline. And yes, this can be hard.
Professional website copywriters may come up with five, 10, sometimes 50 or more headline ideas before landing on the one that will do the job. My tip is to brain dump all of your ideas—no matter how silly they may seem at first. You never know where it might lead. And don’t be afraid to come at it from a few different angles.
Struggling to identify your unique selling point? Maybe I can help. Tell me what you do and don’t like about your headline and I’ll send you some ideas as part of your free copy review.
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